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Devin's Sober Review: "Godzilla vs. Kong"

If you would've told ten year old me that in the year 2021, not only would I still be alive, but that we would be getting a movie starring my two favorite giant monsters, I would have slapped you in the face. But holy shit, here we are! Before we jump into it, I want to say that there is going to be some light * spoiler * talk, so please watch the movie BEFORE you read this! (Or don't watch it first, I don't care.)

For anyone that doesn't know, Godzilla vs Kong is the culmination of a story set in "The Monsterverse", an MCU style storyline starring the aforementioned characters. Starting with Godzilla in 2014, "The Monsterverse" has done an incredible job of building up these creatures as larger than life, and makes them feel like the world revolves around them, and rightly so.

To be honest, I'm not quite sure exactly HOW to write a movie review, so what I'm gonna do is talk about everything I loved, everything I didn't, and then go from there. Lets start with the pros:

First off, this movies visual style, and its cinematography, is absolutely INSANE! Everything from its use of color, to how the fight scenes are framed, to simple long shots of the environments, is breathtaking. The whole movie felt like a masterclass in proper camera work for filmmaking. The director, Adam Wingard, truly is good at his craft, and deserves praise for some of these shots.

Speaking of the fight scenes! Let me say, I've never felt more invested in a Kaiju fight movie in my life. The battles between these two brutes, and trust me when I say, these are BATTLES, are massive. Every time Kong and Godzilla "touch gloves" it immediately takes the movie from a six to a ten, and it takes me from a six to a midnight. They feel like a Wrestlemania EVERY time.

And while there are no real plot points that truly matter on the Godzilla side of things....or really in general (we'll get to that in a moment), Kong's journey is the heart and soul of the film. I won't go into a lot of detail, but if you are on Team Kong (as you should be), you wont be let down by his role in the movie.

Now lets talk about the cons:

The human characters were fucking atrocious. I understand that in Kaiju movies, the humans are always useless. I get that. This isn't lost on me. But holy shit...please give them * some * depth. Its doesn't have to be Kubrick, it doesn't have to be Tarantino, doesn't even have to be Abrams, but give us SOMETHING! Its 2021, for fucks sake! Decent performances from Bryan Tyree Henry, and Millie Bobby Brown, simply can not make up for the rest of the shitty, cardboard cast. God damn, they had Demián Bichir in this movie, and did nothing with him...Come on.

As I mentioned earlier, the plot itself, while simple to follow (Bad Humans need Kong to find a power source/Godzilla hunting down Bad Humans for doing Bad Things/now they fight), is still one note and tired. I'm so sick of the "Humans Did This" plotline that they've been recycling since the 60's. We get it, we suck. Great. Show me the Big Ape punching the Atomic Frog now, please.

This last part is a minor issue, but damnit I'm gonna point it out. The special effects. A lot of them are stellar! I will fully admit to it being one of the best looking movies I've seen in years. BUT! There are some moments where you look at it, and its usually in close ups, or for an establishing shot, and it just looks like ass. The biggest one I can point out is when they bring Kong to Antarctica. He picks up a handful of snow, and man, the snow effects are garbage. I'm talking a video game from 2005 type shit.

To bring this all to a close, I'll summarize it with this. This movie is awesome! Despite all of its little bits I didn't like, it did enough to warrant me to sit through it multiple times in a day. If this is indeed the final entry into "The Monsterverse", as it is rumored to be, its a fitting end. Go watch it!

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